From the best news possible which means The Coffee Fairy is going to finally grow up and match the big boys on the shelves of all the poshest places….(watch this space) to some of the worst news, bad harvest of coffee, friends with serious health problems the difficulties that accompany the growing of any company – I have been so far away from ‘office politics’ for so long that this one took me completely by surprise but let’s not go there.

I’m tired of describing my life as a rollercoaster, because that would imply I could step off anytime I please, instead I appear to have bought a one way ticket, Then again, I’m not sure I would have it any other way…there is simply no pleasing some people!

I have had an ‘interesting’ day today buying water filters with a truck driver ‘sort of a friend of a friend’ from Esteli who assured me he knew his way around Managua, it turned out that he would not be able to navigate his way round a swimming pool. Managua is a pretty unpleasant city at the best of times, but lost in it’s maze, in 35 degree heat in heavy traffic it feels distinctly like hell on earth. I had no idea where we were going, I had the address but had checked and double checked beforehand that the driver knew his way around the city, and stupidly, naively I believed him when he said yes.

It’s my fault really, I fell for it despite plenty of experience to the contrary, just because Nicas tell you they know where they are going, doesn’t mean they do, just because they say ’it’s just around the corner’ doesn’t mean it is. With my right arm suffering 3rd degree sunburn, (the window wouldn’t close and my sunscreen had lost the battle with the relentless tropical sun) and stopping every 45 seconds to ask directions I think I finally lost it when I realised we were driving around in circles because he didn’t know his left from his right.

On the bright side, there are 15 new water filters bought and heading their way up to Esteli right now. Decidedly worth it in the end, and really, that was a good day.

In the months leading up to our departure I did a great impersonation of someone who was totally in control. Of course I was capable of organising an amazing volunteering experience in a third world country with an itinerary that included surfing down volcanoes and a midnight expedition to watch turtles laying and hatching their eggs on a beach as well as a trip to a stunning volcanic crater lake. Inside I was terrified, what if they didn’t like it? Wanted their money back? Wanted to come home? What if we didn’t get on? All questions that were causing me sleepless nights and worry. Not to mention the rainy season…. Nicaragua, it seemed, was experiencing its heaviest rainy season for five years.

Triffic.

Arriving in Nicaragua is an experience in itself, when you are so tired that you could sleep on your feet the painstakingly slow process through passport control is enough to send you over the edge. However Tom, Sarah and Antony were all surprisingly good natured and seemed to be taking it all in their stride. Not even ‘losing’ the taxi drivers when we arrived seem to phase them, it took me about 20 minutes to find our drivers in an airport area the size of a small playground…….well, it was quite dark. Then, I felt that the journey to the hotel really should have broken them, one taxi hit a massive pothole and blew a large wheezy puncture which needed to be changed in virtual darkness by the roadside. While the other taxi, driven by a distracted driver, constantly on his mobile pone, nearly upended on a curve. But these near misses were simply greeted with a great sense of humour and requests for beer once we arrived at the hotel.

Brilliant, my kind of people.

Two and a half days later and having enjoyed blue skies and temperatures of 30 degrees, an introduction to the positives and negatives of Central American cooking and the delights of Nicaraguan rum, we set off for the north. The real work on the school needed to start soon and I had to see my coffee farmers to discuss the new harvest of coffee, this wasn’t Club Med, we had work to do.

Quite what work we had to do remained to be seen, but I kept that bit quiet, I’d figure something out once we arrived in Miraflor, but first we had to get to Esteli.

Nothing has ever been particularly straightforward in Nicaragua, it’s what I love and detest about the place in almost equal measure, which is fine when I’m dealing with it on my own. The pressure increases somewhat when you have three expectant faces looking to you for the answers, you know when rum is not the answer and the Nicaraguans are being less than reliable then, it can be a little bit disconcerting. Not being met by the truck you had booked to meet you is all part of the adventure, at least that is what I kept telling them, and for their part they could all have given the Nicaraguans a lesson in the art of being ’tranquillo’ thank heavens…

We had transport arranged to take us up to Miraflor on the Sunday, due to heavy rainfall the river has now completely overflowed which has rendered it impassable, this means that all transport must go the long way up to the community. That’s a round trip of 6 hours, more if it’s been raining and the roads are a churned up mess of mud. Fortunately, for this part I had booked a truck, and as we sat or stood in the back of the vehicle, all five of us trying to find space amongst 8 bags and rucksacks full of clothes, numerous sacks of fruit and vegetables and a sense of excited anticipation in the boiling sunshine, (I know I know, what rainy season?) I hoped that it would be as good as I believed it could be.

The views certainly didn’t let me down, following months of rainfall the scenery took on an almost Jurassic Park style magnificence, green lush and utterly beautiful. As the three of them took in the breathtaking surroundings on the ride up they were almost speechless, their reactions were perfect, they raved about everything. I was really delighted but I was afraid to get ahead of myself, they had yet to see where they would be staying and the conditions of the toilet, all of which could have them shouting the trade description riot act to me. I couldn’t breathe easily just yet…

As my time here is limited everything has needed to be programmed down to the very last detail to make sure that we could fit in everything in that we had planned. On our to do list were desks to be ordered, school resources to be bought, water filters to be found and ordered, paint to be bought as well as meeting the coffee producers plus untold amounts of film footage for the schools back in the UK. In short, loads to do.
Now, those of you familiar with my previous Nica trips will know that ‘programming’ ‘planning’ and ‘timetable’ are all non existent words in the Nicaraguan dictionary to be replaced with the more familiar phrase of ‘vamos a ver’ or ’let’s see’ which should send me into a somewhat demonic sense of a loss of control…but in fact I’m finding more and more that I can actually cope with the ever changing rules of this place…and sometimes, (don’t tell anyone) i quite enjoy the challenge.

My initial nugget of priceless information was the news that we would not be able to buy water filters in Esteli, why? Simply put, the man who used to supply them had died a few months earlier and as no one else did them that was it, no more water filters in the entire town…..I am trying not to sound heartless here, I did, sort of, extend my heartfelt sympathies to his family, but how totally and incredibly frustrating that no one else saw that this would be a great business opportunity to start their own water filter business… perhaps there is a mourning period between someone copping it and others cashing in on the potential enterprise that this sad passing could offer.

We put that one on frustrated hold for a while to see out what we were able to achieve. The paint was important because we wanted to change the pre-school classroom and make it as beautiful as the classroom we had painted last summer, there didn’t seem to be an issue there, easy enough to buy the paint and we had two more volunteers turning up to give us a hand with the painting, although more importantly with the preparation, always the worst bit especially when you are picking off super glue from bare walls. Ordering desks seemed pretty straightforward too, as did buying the rest of the stuff for the schools, this wasn’t just going to be a piece of cake it was going to be an absolute pleasure, no wonder I felt lucky. Little did I know…although I bet Pollyanna would have had a good idea.

I thought I’d send you an update and let you know how they are all getting on.

All four of us arrived on Saturday night, considering some of the hellish journeys I’ve had in the past this one was relatively straightforward.

Yesterday I went to Managua and came back in the early evening with Marlon, it was a surprise. I had business with the customs agent up there and had arranged to meet Marlon who is part of my Nica family and is my man here in Nicaragua. He adores the coffee project and helps me co-ordinate stuff. He is also a mini celebrity at Dunhurst school where they have seen videos of him speaking in English about the project.

We arrived here at the laguna to see everyone here chatting away and I just said “well, I thought it was about time you met Marlon” I honestly did not realise that Jo could move that fast. She screamed, leapt off the sofa and almost ran to a shocked but happy Marlon and enveloped him in a massive bear hug. It was truly lovely, Will and Maddie also scrambled to come over and they both hugged him and he was beaming. I don’t have any kids but I can say that was the closest I’ve come in a long time to feeling almost parentally proud. Jo was almost in tears and Maddie and Will were just grinning their heads off. Eat your heart out Cilla……

So that evening all three of them finally got to meet one of the most important elements of the Coffee Fairy puzzle and asked him loads of questions about the community and what it’s like and stuff blah blah blah. Now it’s real and they feel comfortable and happy about the fact that they have met Marlon and had the chance to know him before actually going up there. We leave for Esteli tomorrow, you will be relieved to know that we are taking a mini van to the bus station ; )

Thursday we are heading up to Miraflor for one night to take the clothes up, have a look at the toilets they are building and see what paint we shall buy with the money you raised!

So far so good, we haven’t thrown punches…….yet……and they genuinely seem to be loving the entire experience which makes me very happy indeed to have them here.

I figured as I’ve been here for about ten days it was about time I let you know how it’s all going.

Some of you will be more than aware that I left for this trip absolutely worried sick because I was turned down by the bank at the 11th hour for a loan extension. Probably the worst preparation for a trip to come and buy coffee is not having any money to buy the coffee, however in terms of a weight loss programme I could highly recommend it.

I won’t go into too many details, I’ve had the biggest learning curve ever, last year was difficult for me to get to grips with how this business should work, it’s lonely, – I wish I could follow that with ‘on the top’ but I’m still very much on the bottom – however I do know how to climb up and that is my intention. I need lots of significant orders, from restaurants, shops, offices and even school staff rooms, otherwise no amount of positive thinking is going to help. I have plenty to do and I will do it, it’s just going to be a little tougher than I thought…… what a load of bollocks, it’s going to be ridiculously hard work and frankly I cannot wait.

So, I was turned down by the bank, fair enough really, my pre-Christmas fairs had been brilliant in terms of finally making some money and some great marketing but it was nowhere near enough to convince the underwriters of the loan that I knew what I was doing…I did wonder if they knew that I had been working my way through the tins of Quality Street I had bought as gifts for the Nica kids.

I don’t know why I’m making light of all of this, I honestly didn’t know what to do, I had maxed out every credit card possible, withdrawn all the funds I had and still I knew I didn’t have enough, not just not enough for the coffee, but not enough to ship anything back to England.

I have been more than a little close to the edge…whatever that means, I know ’it’s only money’ it was more the feeling of being entirely out of control that terrified me. By the time I met with Marlon I was all out of tears and felt more as if I was in shock as I told him everything. At one point I looked at him and said “I will find a way to do this”. He just looked at me and said “I know, I trust you”

Ok, agreed, I wish I had his expense account, time and clothes allowance not forgetting a dry martini waiting for me every time I step out of the (cold) shower although he can keep the birds in the swimsuits, still, I think I could give him a run for his money in the nail biting stakes after the couple of weeks I’ve just had.

Following my last blog I thought I was pretty much on top of things, I never for one second thought that I was in control, but I reckoned I was managing. I delayed my flight by eight days so that I wouldn’t be stressing out in England about what was happening over here. I had also organised with the Dutch film guy to come up to Esteli on Monday so we could go on up to Miraflor together to film. I had even managed to take out a large lump sum of money from the bank to pay for the coffee (instead of lots of smaller withdrawals) and finally in my master plan I had checked with Marlon to make sure that it was ok to come up to Esteli on the Saturday to hand over the money so he could pay the farmers. Of course that would be fine, and I, briefly forgetting every lesson learnt here, believed him.

Of course it wasn’t fine, handing over $3000 to someone and asking them to take it on a bus, walk 6 miles and pay some farmers would not only be unfair it would also be stupid and irresponsible of me. That amount of money is two years salary here and if anyone knew that Marlon had the money the risk would be huge. No, I am not being melodramatic, although if you add into the mix that this was late Saturday night and I had to get the money up to Miraflor the next day by 7.30am or the coffee would leave the farm and be sold somewhere else – well borderline hysteria just about describes it…..

Fortunately my friends who I stay with in Esteli came to the rescue, they immediately called a friend of theirs who has a truck and he agreed (for $25) to pick me up at 6am to take me up to Miraflor. That has been the best £13 I have ever spent, we picked up Marlon and Mayra on the way there and drove to the farm, and there they were; sacks and sacks of coffee fairy coffee, it was incredible, we weighed it all, counted out the money and paid the farmers and still it kept coming, one of the farmers had heard I was at the farm and had turned up with more sacks of coffee strapped onto a horse. I was told stories of how much money it was saving the farmers because they didn’t need to transport the coffee by bus to the nearest town, nor did they lose an entire days work doing so, beat that Mr. Bond.

That was the first time I had come even slightly close to really seeing how the project could work, it wasn’t that I hadn’t believed in it up until then, it was that I hadn’t allowed myself to. It was a very lovely feeling.

But it was shortlived…..I mean come on, it was never going to be easy was it?

I have made life complicated for myself, without a doubt, doing business in two different countries was always going to be a challenge, but if one of those countries is classified as Third World and divvies up into a further three sectors, well, I am either incredibly naiive or just plain asking for trouble. In the capital Managua I have my team of legal people, well two anyway, plus a fantastic customs agent who is delightfully laid back, great if you are having dinner with him, not so reassuring if you are panicking about how to export for the first time…… and of course my shipping company, run by a misogynist, no need for me to keep out of his way, as a female and white and over 29 I simply don’t exist for him. Makes life much simpler.

Most of these people are constantly trying to put my mind at rest with how simple everything is going to be and that the processes are very straightforward, I’ve spent hours in freezing air conditioned meetings with them all talking very quickly and at once about which documents are needed and when in rapid spanish. They seem to know what they are doing……

Up in Esteli in the north I have to start a search for a reliable accountant, swap ‘reliable’ for ‘trustworthy’, accountants here don’t have quite the same reputation as they do in England, here they have a tendancy to just steal your money rather than bore you to death. Also in Esteli there is the processing plant owned by a very large and profitable company that has the monopoly on most of the coffee sold in the north. They are allowing me to process the coffee, for a price, what they don’t want anything to do with is my exportation issues, way too much hassle for them when I don’t represent large amounts of cash. Of course they know that’s not what I want to hear, so they don’t tell me that initially, instead I am given large tempting bites at an imaginary carrot. They adored the story of the project, a single person, and a woman to boot, investing in a company to help one of our poor communities, trying for a future that will help benefit the children….yep, not a dry eye in the house.

“Perhaps we could offer you a shared shipment with one of our bigger more successful exporters?”

“Perhaps, if we could sort out the invoice issue, (as in I am buying direct from producers and not from them) then we could help you with the exporting paperwork”

Feeling that these are less like tempting bites of a carrot and more like winning the lottery, I couldn’t believe how helpful they were being. And here is where I learnt one of my biggest lesson, never believe a word of anything here until it actually happens, because invariably it won’t. Come to think of it this place is full of invaluable lessons, don’t bother getting angry is another, absolutely pointless unless you want to drive yourself into an early grave, they simply don’t do anger, and if you do, they will be laughing at you for months to come. The Parisians may well have perfected the couldn’t give a toss shrug but the Nicas can tilt their heads utter a short “Ahhh” and appear to be genuinely interested and sympathetic while simultaneously working out where they need to be next.

The shared shipment didn’t come off in the end nor did the help with exporting it, of course it didn’t, it wasted three days of my time before they were able to tell me but then no one is in a hurry here, unless they are hungry.

It’s been a manic few weeks, not least because I am going away for a bit, and I wanted as many ‘clients’ as possible so that we could gauge how much coffee would be needed for the future, in that respect it has been frustrating to say the least. Generally people are very enthusiastic about the idea of buying organic coffee and they will buy a pound bag and wax lyrical about how great it smells but then they are unwilling to commit for any large amount which is such a shame. This happened very recently in Leon where I was fixed up to meet the local supermarket manager, once I had made sure that I had was there for 9.30am – a 5am start for me to get there on time – I couldn’t see the director because he had changed his mind that morning and was leaving any new product purchasing until the start of January.

Yes it would have been nice to have been told that in advance but ultimately there is no point in getting upset about it, however if they don’t take it in January then I will give them a piece of my mind…

I do understand that that is how small businesses start and in many respects I would rather that it went slowly and surely rather than explode and end up failing due to unfulfilled ordering before we even got anywhere.

It’s not all doom and gloom by any means, I was approached by yet another women’s cooperative up in Miraflor who had heard about the success of the project and are really keen to get involved, this is excellent news because the more people we have interested in it the more coffee supply we will have in the future, I am also delighted because it’s one of the communities where I taught and where I used to live and it’s a huge accolade that they had heard of the project and thought that it was a great idea so much so that they want to be a part of it.